It was early 2000, and somewhere in a village in Punjab, a girl was living a stress-free idyllic life. She was studying but had no big dreams because there was nobody in her surroundings to take inspiration from. She, then, went to the University of Punjab for her Master’s. This was the first time away from her family, so she became home sick. But, she slowly started to feel independent and began to enjoy the freedom. She now wanted to live her life the way she wanted.
However, there were talks about her marriage in her family. That became a nightmare for her. She couldn’t imagine herself as a housewife and asked one year time from her father. He agreed, and she cracked UPSC CSE. Not in the first attempt, but eventually.
This is the story of IRTS officer Dr. Promila Gupta. In an exclusive conversation with Indian Masterminds, she shared her journey of becoming a civil servant, and how the monotony of the service helped her to explore herself and become an author, a poet, and a motivational speaker. She is currently serving as Deputy Chief Operations Manager, Planning, in Northern Railway.
OPTION OF DOING NOTHING
Dr. Gupta comes from a Marwari family based in Punjab. A family where no member had any interest in education or in any kind of job. All her sisters were married off early and the lives of the women in the family were mundane. “The only thing important for them was cooking. They would only talk about what to make for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I didn’t want that kind of life,” Dr. Gupta told Indian Masterminds.
To settle down to that life was an easy choice before her, but she chose a drastically different path. While she was study in the university, a marriage proposal came for her. She panicked and requested her father to give her some time so that she could take up a job first. She told her family that she wanted to be a teacher, but they refused. So, she told them about civil service and how respectable a profession it is, and asked time to prepare for the qualifying exam CSE.
Speaking about those days, she said, “I had seen a junior of mine who was a UPSC CSE aspirant. Even though he had not cracked it, still everybody would give him so much respect. I wondered about the kind of respect he would get when he actually cracks the exam. How much more will he be respected in society. So, I used his case and managed to convince my father. He agreed only because of the stature of this service.”
FATHER SHOWED CONFIDENCE IN HER
And, thus, began her UPSC preparation journey. Cracking the exam was her goal but she also enjoyed the process of reading and gaining knowledge about the world. Her father noticed the hard work she was putting in. So, even though she couldn’t clear the Prelims in the first attempt, he gave her another chance. This time, she made it through the Prelims, which was big! “My father now believed in me. He had the confidence that I could bring name and fame to the family. He asked me to go to Delhi to prepare better,” she said.
She went and joined a coaching centre in Delhi. In her third attempt, she finally reached till the interview stage but could not make it to the final list. She was heartbroken and wanted to quit. “I started to feel like I had wasted my time. That time, my family, especially my sister, supported me and told me give one last try,” Dr. Gupta said.
She appeared for the Prelims again. Around this time, an extended list was declared by the UPSC where her name featured. She had been selected for IDES. This boosted her confidence, and in the fourth attempt, she cleared the exam again and became an IRTS officer of 2006 batch. Although she is satisfied with her journey, she advises aspirants to use their attempts very wisely.
BECOMING THE UNIVERSE
She also said that what she thought was the end of her journey was actually where it really began. She got her first posting in North-Eastern Railway and was later transferred to Northern Railway. Although she was getting many opportunities to perform, she started feeling a monotony in her job. “I was looking forward to a particular posting and being the senior, I should have got it, but didn’t. I felt disappointed but, soon, I realized that it was not in my hands. The only thing that I can control is my life. And it is up to me how I want to utilize my time,” said Dr. Gupta.
Till now, she had come to believe that if you wish for something, then the universe conspires to let you have it. But, now, she finally realized that the universe was no one else but she herself! She can get what she wants with hard work. Hence, she started to focus on herself and meditate. All this helped and her mind became free.
As it is said, when the mind is free, one becomes creative. The same happened with her and she started to write poetry. Two of her poem collections have already been published. She has also written a book titled ‘How I Became Universe’. She is now working on her second book, ‘Why Waste Womanhood’, and hopes to get it published soon.
